Winter's Rain
by grednforge23
Summary: His name is James Buchanan Barnes. And he's going to take back his life. My take on a way things could have happened without Civil War. Set about a month after Winter Soldier. Rated M for language because I'm a potty mouth and let's be real so is Bucky.
1. Chapter 1

Winter's Rain

Being in hiding shouldn't have been a problem for him. Having been a former Hydra weapon, it was something he was far more used to than for most people. But something about having just fought someone who may or may not have known him years ago made the whole deal harder.

After going through the Smithsonian exhibit that only left him more confused about his past, he decided to go away. Far away. But apparently he needed to work on his definition of far away, considering he ended up in New York.

It only took about an hour for all the flashing lights and constant noise to make him antsy and looking for quiet. This brought him to a surprisingly packed coffee shop in a mostly unoccupied part of the city. Luckily, even though so many people were there, most of the small tables had two, if not three people sitting at them, it was still mostly quiet. The easy listening station and the quiet murmurs of the other patrons were the only noticeable sounds.

He looked around for an empty table, frowning when he found no such thing. The emptiest table he saw had one person at it, a young woman with her form hunched over a laptop, typing furiously.

Her brown hair was cut short and spiked in the front and clunky, dorky looking glasses covered her face, hiding her eye color from his angle. The drink on the table in front of her looked barely touched, but the papers that covered the rest of it showed she'd been there a while. He looked around again in vain before getting in line.

A few minutes later he had a coffee in his hand, black and piping hot, and was standing to the side, debating whether or not he should ask the brunette if he could sit with her. Eventually one of the baristas got his attention. "Dude, you've been staring at her since you came in. Either go talk to her or I'm gonna call the cops and tell'em some creep is stalkin one of my regulars."

He snapped his head around to glare at the barista but he was already gone and helping another customer. He waited another minute before actually going over to her.

Her typing didn't pause as he walked closer, her full attention to the screen in front of her, giving him time to look at the papers at her table. Various newspaper clippings were strewn about, showing different superheroes at different points from the past few years. Looking at the tops of the papers, he saw different names from all over the country though most seemed to be localized in and around New York.

He looked at her for a second, wondering if she would notice him without him having to do anything, before seeing that obviously wasn't going to happen and clearing his throat. She jumped and squeaked at the sudden noise, looking up at him with pink cheeks. "Um, yes?"

"Uh… Can I sit there?" He nodded to the seat across from her.

She shifted a little, looking away before meeting his gaze again. "May I ask why..?"

"Well, everywhere else is kind of full and I'd rather drink this here than out there."

He nodded to the door distastefully, making her smile a little. "Lemme guess, either the noise or the lights?"

"Both, actually." She giggled a little, motioning for him to sit.

"Then I take it this is your first time to New York. Well, that and the fact that you're here." He quirked an eyebrow but didn't say anything, waiting for her to explain as he settled himself in the chair across from her. She pulled the top of her laptop mostly down before leaning in a bit with a small smile on her face and he caught a faint scent of vanilla. "See, people only come here if they know where they're going or they're here by accident. I come in here at least once a week, if not more, and I've never seen you before. So, logic dictates this is your first time around here."

He looked vaguely impressed, leaning back in his seat and taking a sip of his slightly cooled drink. "Not bad. But you're a bit off."

He was met with a raised eyebrow and the soft snap of her laptop being closed. "Do tell." Bright brown eyes met steely blue head on as her red stained lips curled around her straw and took a long sip. He cleared his throat and shifted a little in his chair, sitting up a bit straighter.

"I actually used to live here. In Brooklyn. But that was a long time ago and I don't remember much of it at all." He looked down at the table to keep his mind from wandering.

She was confused, no doubt, but didn't push. "So what brought ya back? If ya don't mind me askin of course."

"It's complicated.." She nodded and things got quiet between them again. She took the opportunity to look him over. Long dark hair fell into his face, stubble covered his jaw and cheeks like a shadow, but nothing could make his stunning eyes any less bright. Even the dark circles around them couldn't diminish it. A black jacket and matching black shirt covered his arms and chest, and black gloves covered his hands. This made her raise an eyebrow, seeing as it wasn't particularly cold.

He took a sip of his coffee, taking note of the fact that she was looking at him. Seemingly checking him out. He couldn't imagine why, but didn't bring attention to it. He'd gotten a look when he first saw her.

Brown hair and eyes didn't make her look all that interesting, until he got a closer look. She had more piercings than he'd ever seen on a woman before, two in her left ear and three in her right, and both ears had one hole at least big enough to fit a pencil. He had also seen, he thought, a flash of blue inside her mouth when she had been talking, but he wasn't sure. Her outfit, like the rest of her didn't look like much until further inspection.

Her shirt had something he didn't understand on it, something about a soft kitty with a big cartoon picture of a cat, and her jeans had various doodles on them, mostly from stuff he didn't recognise. He did see a few logos he thought he knew and had a very clear view of the SHIELD logo and what looked like his mission- no. Steve. Steve's shield.

His eyebrows furrowed at the sight of it, making her quirk an eyebrow. "What?"

"That thing on your jeans. The shield. How do you know that?"

She gave him a look. "You're kidding, right? That's _Captain America's_ shield! Everyone knows it! I mean, after the Battle of New York, then that thing like, last month in D.C., not to mention he's had a Smithsonian exhibit for like, forever! I've never actually been to it, but I've read all about'im online. Superheroes are kinda fascinating to me."

She blushed a little and looked back down at the table, taking a sip of her drink as she started gathering up her papers. She ended up shoving them in a notebook he hadn't noticed, and it and her laptop into her purse. She shifted a little awkwardly on her seat, her eyes trailing back to his hands. "Why're you wearing gloves? It's not all that cold out."

He looked down at his gloves, clenching his hands into light fists before stretching them back out. He didn't look at her as he responded. "Because otherwise you wouldn't be talking to me. No one would."

His left hand twitched, just barely. He didn't feel it though. He wouldn't have even known it had happened, had he not been staring right at it.

She saw too, the corners of her mouth twitching down. "Now I doubt that. It can't be that ba-"

"It is. Trust me." Their eyes met again, blue on brown, as her hand slowly moved toward his. He didn't know why, but he didn't feel particularly compelled to move. A second before her hand would have touched the gloves, his hand jerked back. "You don't want to do that."

She wrinkled her brow but pulled her hand back anyways. "... Is there any way I could get you to change your mind?"

"Probably not." He kept from looking at her.

She just nodded slowly before looking up with a small smile. "I just realised I never introduced myself."

She held a hand out tentatively. "Amber Rain Harrison."

He looked at her hand wearily, making her roll her eyes. "I'm not gonna try to take your glove off. Swearzies. I'm just tryna be polite."

He sighed and shook hands with her. The material was soft and warm on her hand, something she couldn't quite place but liked anyway. He still hadn't said anything.

"Ya know, it's also polite to respond with your own name." She prompted, an eyebrow raised as she pulled her hand away.

He hesitated for a second, honestly having to remember, but when he speaks he sounds just as confident with it as she did. "James Buchanan Barnes."

Her eyebrows drew together in vague recognition. "Have we met before?"

He shook his head. "Nope."

"Hm… Well your name sounds familiar."

He tried his hardest not to tense, saying casually as he could. "I know I haven't met you before. I'd remember someone like you."

Her cheeks flushed pink and she giggled. "Well Mister Barnes, in that case it's a pleasure to meet you."

Suddenly his brain flashed backwards. He saw a girl with dark curls precisely pinned up in a bun, wearing a red dress that accentuated her curves. His hand held hers as the giggled in exactly the same way, brown eyes sparkling. He felt his past self smile and press a kiss to the back of her hand. "Pleasure's all mine Miss. Now how 'bout we go dance?"

He snapped back to reality holding his head and hissing in pain. Amber looked at him, eyes wide and confused. "James? Are you ok?"

He held up a finger as the pain slowly started to subside. He let out a few small puffs of air to try and control his heart rate again before setting his head down on the table and just letting it sit for a minute.

Out of instinct she went to rub the back of his neck, only to have her wrist grabbed hard. "Don't. Touch me."

She whimpered a little but stayed still. A few minutes passed and slowly his grip lessened but she was still reluctant to pull away. It wasn't until he picked his head back up that she pulled her hand back. She looked over her wrist as he looked down at his lap.

"... I'm sorry…" The words weren't something he was used to saying, especially not recently, but he still remembered the impact they had on people.

"No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have… I-it's just habit… I do it to my friends when they're in pain."

He nodded a bit before looking up at her. "Is your wrist ok?"

She nodded a little, flexing and turning it different ways before just shaking it out. "Yeah. It hurts a little but I'll just take some ibuprofen and get over it." She shrugged and smiled a little. "D'you want some for your head? I don't know what that was but it seemed like it hurt."

"Do you have some with you?"

"Lemme check. I usually have a bottle with me." She pulled her rather large Harry Potter cross body into her lap before starting to empty it in search of the pill bottle. His eyes widened at the mass amount of stuff that came out of this woman's purse. Her laptop, notebook and papers from earlier, along with a pencil, a deck of cards, a loaded keychain, a can of pepper spray, some sort of tablet, and a wallet that frankly looked more like a man's wallet than a woman's all came out along with a few odds and ends before she pulled out a smaller bag. "Aha! Found you, you little bastard!"

He raised an eyebrow at her but she didn't notice. She looked into the smaller bag,fiddling around inside of it before pulling out a white bottle a grin. "Ibuprofen for one Mister Barnes."

He smiled a little as she opened the bottle, pouring two pills into her hand before holding her hand out. "Here ya go."

He took the pills, swallowing both with a sip of his lukewarm coffee. His nose wrinkled a little at the taste, making her chuckle. "You want another coffee? Mine's mostly melted anyways and I don't mind getting you one."

He looked down at the dregs in his cup before looking back up at her and nodding. "That'd actually be really nice. Thank you."

She beamed and waved him off as she got up, taking both their cups. "It's no problem, sweetheart. Just black coffee?"

He nodded again before she flounced off, leaving him at the table with all of her stuff spread out on the table as she ordered their coffee, and he couldn't help but smilea little bit to himself. This woman he'd just met already trusted him enough to leave her stuff. After all these years, that seemed hard to believe, but here he was.

She came back a minute later with both their cups in hand, plopping down in her spot across from him with a smile as she slides his cup to him. "So, seeing as you're back for the first time in I don't know how long cuz you wouldn't tell me, where're ya stayin?"

He shrugged and sipped his coffee. "I can find somewhere to stay. Shouldn't be a problem."

Her lips twitched down, hands curled around her own cup. "Are you sure? I remember when I first moved up here, I had to stay in a hotel the first night I was here and it was ridiculous expensive, unless I wanted to stay in a really crap hotel."

"I'll be fine Amber. I've stayed in worse places than a crappy hotel." He got that far away look in his eyes she was growing accustomed to.

She hummed softly, sipping her frappucino. She checked the time on her phone before her eyes widened and she almost choked on her drink. "Shit, is it already that late? Fuck…"

She started shoving all her stuff back in her bag, draining her cup as fast as she could as she did. Once she was almost all packed up she seemed to have a thought, ripping a blank page out of her notebook and scribbling something down before almost shoving it in his hand. "Listen, James, it was great talking to you but if I don't run I'm gonna be late to a meeting with my boss and he already doesn't like me so just hold on to that and call me later, alright? Hopefully I'll talk to you soon!"

She grinned and with that she was out of the coffee shop, leaving James Buchanan Barnes alone in a coffee shop with the phone number of a girl he just met in his hand and a weird, tingly feeling in his stomach he hadn't felt in years.

 _Coffee later? Call me! Amber xx 202-555-0114_

 **Hello hello! So this is a story I started a while ago but never finished, and honestly I still don't have it all typed up. I have no clue when update's will happen, but I'll try to get another one out soon, work and life permitting. I hope y'all enjoyed this first chapter, as always constructive criticism is welcomed and flames will be used to roast marshmallows and the souls of the damned! See you next chapter! -KRS ^_^**


	2. Chapter 2

By the time Amber got back to her apartment she'd almost forgotten about what had happened at The Brewed Awakening before her meeting. Almost. It wasn't until she plopped down on her old shitty futon in her living room and started pulling stuff out of her bag she remembered.

After the papers for her next unofficial assignment from her also unofficial boss, J. Jonah Jameson, her laptop and notebook came out. An empty page fluttered out of her notebook after being opened and closed so many times at the meeting. She furrowed her eyebrows, silently questioning herself as to why there would be a page ripped out before it came back to her. The cute guy back at the coffee shop. James. She couldn't help but smiled as a bit of pink covered her cheeks.

Sure she'd only met the man that day but there was no denying he was attractive. Chiseled jawline, gorgeous eyes, big pouty lips, and that was just his face. She didn't really get the opportunity to see any more, but she had no doubt it was just as nice from the neck down. Her blush got deeper and she restrained a nervous giggle, even though she was the only one in her little apartment.

"No. Stop it Amber. You barely know the guy. You just met him today. Bad." She scolded herself before sighing and laying back against her futon.

She pulled out her phone a minute later and took it off of silent, lips turning down slightly when she saw she had no calls or texts. Not a second later however, one of her friends from back home texted her, making her grin.

 **Moma Blair: Hey babe! How's my favorite New Yorker doing? 3**

Her grin widened as she texted back.

 **Deano: Good, good.**

 **Moma Blair: Anything interesting happen today? I know you had a meeting with that douche of a boss of yours.**

Her cheeks flushed pink again at the thought of the man she'd met earlier.

 **Deano: Oh, nothing much. He was a douche like normal, but I've got another assignment that'll keep me out of there for a while.**

 **Moma Blair: That's good.**

 **Deano: How are things back home? Everyone good?**

 **Moma Blair: Yeah, everyone's good mostly. Theo still misses you like crazy.**

Her heart twinged and she bit her lip, closing her eyes briefly before messaging back.

 **Deano: I miss him too. But don't tell him. It won't help either of us.**

 **Moma Blair: Yeah, I got you boo. :(**

Things were quiet for a few minutes before Blair texted again.

 **Moma Blair: SO other than that did anything happen?**

She couldn't help but smile at her friend who, even from so far away, was trying to make her feel better. She also knew there was no point keeping anything from her, seeing as there was no real was she could embarrass her from so far away.

 **Deano: I might have met someone at the coffee shop…**

Before Amber could even add anything, Blair texted back, making her giggle.

 **Moma Blair: Ooooh! Boy? Girl? Cute? I need details!**

 **Deano: Definitely boy and /definitely/ cute. Long dark hair, pretty blue eyes, big pouty lips. Looked pretty muscley but he was pretty bundled up so I'm not sure. Overall a yes.**

 **Moma Blair: Niiiice. What happened?**

Amber sat back more against her futon, getting comfortable before responding.

 **Deano: Well I was just sitting at one of the tables, working like normal, when he walked up and asked if he could sit with me. There weren't really any other options and he looked pretty uncomfortable and cautious so I figured why not and let him sit. We talked for a while then I had to go cuz of the meeting so I gave him my number and told him to call me later. Now it's just a waiting game for me.**

 **Moma Blair: You actually straight up gave him your number? I'm impressed!**

 **Deano: Oh shush. -/- :P**

 **Moma Blair: XD You know I'm just teasing. So he hasn't contacted you yet?**

 **Deano: Nope. Nothing yet.**

Almost immediately after hitting send her phone buzzed, notifying her of a call from an unknown number. She brightened up and hit the green accept button. On the other end of the line she heard someone shuffling around then a somewhat gruff voice she recognized. "Hello? Is this Amber..?"

She held back a grin, wanting to be sure it was the right person. "Yes, is this James?"

More shuffling then a somewhat tentative sounding "Yes.."

She grinned outright at this point. "Hi! How are you?"

"Not bad. You?"

She sighed a little, rubbing her eyes behind her glasses. "My boss was a jerk like normal, but I still have a job this month so that's good."

After a bit of silence she spoke up again. "So did you find a place to stay tonight?"

He stayed quiet for a second. "Uh, yeah. I'll be fine."

She frowned a little bit. "Because I know we just met today and all, but you seem like a really nice guy and I wouldn't want you to have to sleep on the street or in a shelter or something like that if I can help it."

Again he got quiet, seeming to be mentally arguing with himself for a minute before he sighed softly. "I guess.. Alright…"

She beamed. "Ok! I'll just text you my address and-"

"Text?" She can hear genuine confusion in his voice, making her eyebrows furrow.

"Yeah, text. Can your phone not do that?"

"Well, I'm at a payphone right now so… No?"

"Oh. Well, do you have something to write with?"

"Uh," She heard faint shuffling again. "Yeah."

She quickly rattled off her address, listening closely as he read it back.

"Sounds good. So, see you soon?"

"Maybe not soon, but tonight." She heard more shuffling and a soft curse before he talked again, voice much quieter than before. "I have to go. See you later. Bye."

Before she could say anything in return there was a click and he was gone, leaving her staring at her phone with wide eyes, mentally reeling.

Over the course of the phone call a few text messages had racked up from Blair, which she checked quickly.

 **Moma Blair: Well let me know what happened, alright?**

 **Moma Blair: Amber?**

 **Moma Blair: Hello?**

She responded quickly, fingers flying over the little touchscreen.

 **Deano: Sorry! He called like, right after my last message.**

 **Moma Blair: And? :D**

 **Deano: He… Might be coming over…**

A second later her phone is buzzing again, Blair's picture glowing bright on screen. Amber laughed and rolled her eyes fondly before answering, holding her phone away from her ear so she didn't go deaf when her friend screeched, "WHAT?!"

"Can you not read? He's coming over."

"How the hell did that happen?"

"Well if you'd calm down I'd tell you."

She heard Blair take a deep breath, blowing it out slowly before she responded. "Alright. I'm calm. Now details."

"So you know how I said we talked at the coffee shop?"

"Yeah."

"Well, one of the things that we talked about was that he didn't really have a place to stay cuz he's new in town. Well, not really _new_ , apparently, but it's his first time back in a long time which I don't really get because he doesn't even look that old but-"

"Amber. Point."

"Right! So when he called pretty much the first thing I asked is if he had a place to stay for the night and he didn't really say so I kinda just… Offered to let him stay the night."

"... Well for your sake I hope he's not some psycho. Course, if he is, maybe you could finally meet one of those superheroes you're always writing about."

Amber could hear the grin in her friend's voice and couldn't help but blush a little. "It's my job! People like hearing about them and their stories!"

"Suuuuure." She snickered.

"Oh, shut up." Amber huffs, cheeks still pink.

"Just be careful with this guy tonight, ok? He may seem like a nice guy but that doesn't mean he is."

Amber rolls her eyes fondly. "Yes mom. I'll be careful"

"You better. Ok, I actually have to go. Mom asked me to come over and help her with some stuff around the house."

"Alright. Talk to you later. I love you!"

"I love you too! Bye!"

With that she hung up, leaving Amber to the emptiness of her apartment.

 **Hello hello! And finally we have chapter 2! Sorry this took so long, been working my ass off lately and haven't had much time to just sit down and write. Also, sorry if this was a bit shorter than the last chapter. It's more of a transitional one. Next chapter will definitely have more interaction and backstory elements. Who knows! maybe even more new characters or some old favorites! Honestly even I don't know! Tune in next time though! As always, reviews and constructive criticism are welcomed, but flames will be used to roast the marshmallows and the souls of the damned. Until next time, bye bye! -KRS**


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